5 Dec 2007


13 Funny Christmas Quotes

1. The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband."

2. Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

3. Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven.

4. Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?

6. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.

7. Let me see if I've got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn't laundering illegal drug money

8. Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year

9. How do you know Santa has to be a man?
No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year..

10.The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

11. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

12. Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present

13. From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it.

I have got these 16 awards from my blogfriend Sanni at Coffee 2 go and thank her very much. I framed them together otherwise I would have to have opened a new blog !

and I feel that I should honor her with this award !

For Sanni !


SandyCarlson said...

Those quotes are lots of fun! Thanks for the midnight fun.

You deserve all those awards.

God bless.

Coco said...

LOL. I love the one about Santa doing illegal business. Hahah. Nice ones. Congratulations on the awards, and what nice Christmas layout you have :)

Yuriko said...

Very funny! Thanks for sharing! Happy TT!

Jeanette said...

Hi Gattina, Very funny Xmas quotes. Congratulations on all your awards

pussreboots said...

Funny list. Happy TT.

jenn said...

I used the claustrophobic joke this week too!
Happy tt!

Maribeth said...

Wonderful! I am doing my Christmas 13 next week!!!

Unknown said...

Great quotes and congrats on the awards. Happy Holidays!

Kate Johnson said...

#12 is brilliant, and so true!

Robin said...

#6 cracked me up!

maryt/theteach said...

Funny quotes, Gattina! Thanks for the laughs.

My TT post is up at Answers to the Questions

Shelly Kneupper Tucker said...

As always, Gattina, you are so funny you make me snort coffee on the computer monitor. Loved the quotes. Let's see if I can make your comment register me.

Shelly Kneupper Tucker said...

Nope, I still have to type the whole thing.
This Eclectic Life
I hate the new Blogger feature that makes me have to type all this code! It's inhospitable.

Head Gaggler said...

Haha, those are too funny!

Vixen of Vixensden.com said...

Those are really great. I want to try the batteries, toys not included one on my kids!

Happy TT

Kate said...

Thesee´are lots of fun. Especially the stockings and the wrapping paper.

Nicholas said...

Funny quotes, and congratulations on the awards.

Heart of Rachel said...

Hi Gattina. Those are really funny quotes. Amazing how you gathered them all.

My son has a long list of toys he wants for Christmas. Maybe I should think of that #6. Ha ha!

Congratulations on all those blog awards!

colleen said...

Who said all that stuff? I love the line about hating office parties because of looking for a job the next day.

TopChamp said...

so many awards! Nice x

Happy TT - made me laugh

Melli said...

LOL! I'm going to try that battery thing this year!

Julie said...

Great quotes. Some very funny ones! I loved your pictures of Egypt..thanks for sharing!

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Those are very cute! Happy TT a day late... I'm catching up today!

Unknown said...

Hallo, meine Liebe!

Vielen, vielen Dank für den schlumpfigen Award =)
Natürlich werde ich ihn in Ehren halten!

Bei uns ist alles okay soweit - mal abgesehen vom vorweihnachtlichen Allerlei. Meine Schwiegermama is spe gibt sich z.Zt. die Ehre und somit sind wir viel unterwegs *grins* und vorher musste natürlich unser Heim pinibel aufpoliert werden.

Ich hoffe, Ihr habt eine besinnliche Adventszeit und Nikolaus hat die frisch geputzten Stiefel ordentlich gefüllt. =)

Hab gestern auf dem Weihnachtsmarkt an Dich gedacht, während ich gesündigt habe: große Portion belgische Pommes mit Samurai Sauce...

Tink said...

Haha, great quotes! Very funny. :-)
Thanks for visiting my animated movies TT.