4 Feb 2023


As usual I would say, it was raining and cold and I decided to make a lazy day. To be honest all my days are lazy with some exceptions. 

On Tuesday I gathered all my courage to go out and went to the city hall to pick up our theatre tickets. There is one presentation for the seniors for 4 € entrance fee ! 

This time my neighbor also called Nicole, wanted to come with us, so I had to get 3 tickets. For Nicole it was the first time since she lived in our building for 15 years ! The rest of us are newcomers.

I am busy to read my very first blog which I made private. I started in 2006 and it was surprising to see how easy it was, compared to today,  but at that time we all found it difficult ! Blogging had just started. I was the 2000 Blogger in the whole Blogger world, it's unbelievable ! 

I got this photo from Google and my son picked me out and enlarged my picture !

Finally  I had filled in 3 big plastic bags with Rick's belongings and brought them to the charity shop for battered women. And as the sun was shining but it was cold and windy, I made a tour with my car, without any special destination, just driving and I stated to my surprise, that lots of houses had been demolished and replaced by ugly grey buildings, and also a lot of little shops or boutiques had closed forever and new once had opened. It seemed to me that I was in another town. When we moved to Waterloo it was a charming little village with no Supermarket and lots of little shops and farms. 

Now the cows are replaced by people and the tractors by a lot of cars, far too much for the narrow streets. The farms have disappeared and houses built. I told my GPS to go home, I had enough of this new city. 

I had promised Nicole (my friend for a very long time) to pick her up at her retirement home and spent the afternoon with me in my apartment. That would be a little change for her. Now it becomes more and more difficult because she walks very slowly and needs a walker. The walker didn't fit in my mini car so she took my arm and she could get alone into the car. When we were at home I noticed that she can't smile anymore. She had been such a funny girl and laughed a lot even about nothing, now all funny things I told her instead of bursting out in laughter she didn't move her mouth. But she also told me about the life in the home, there is one very elegant, posh lady who carries her false teeth in her purse and takes them out when they are in the dining room and she sits at the table. That made me laugh of course, she probably laughed too but I could only guess. 

She shows more and more the same signs as Rick and makes me really sad. Her head is still working very well and we could chat as usual and I could ask her whatever I had to know and she helped me. But she can't write anymore and also not use the phone. Just as Rick. Fortunately she has her family, because the so said best friends all disappeared. 

 Happy times


This weekend my son and grandson come to visit me, so I am happy to have them with me ! 

more participants at Susanne at Living to tell the Story.

1 Feb 2023


1. Tell us anything you want about your January. 

That's quickly done, on January 1, I didn't feel well and thought I will get the flu. But I had no running nose, no fever, nothing, just feeling bad. That lasted a week and then I called the doctor who prescribed me antibiotics and in a week I felt better, but I am still feeling weak.


Besides getting rid of my few  Christmas decorations, which took me two days, I didn't do anything special, my neighbors did the shopping for me, just fruits, the rest I had enough stock. January is a terrible month, there is nothing to do outside, the weather was awful but fortunately today it's over !

2.  Lake Superior State University posts a list each year of words they think should be banished from the Queen's English for misuse, overuse, and/or general uselessness. The 2023 list includes GOAT, inflection point, quiet quitting, gaslighting, moving forward, amazing, Does that make sense?, irregardless, absolutely, and it is what it is. Which of these words/phrases do you use regularly? Which of these words would you most like to see banished from everyday speech and why? Is there a word/phrase not on the list you'd like to add? 

Of course I won't use the word Goat every day, but if I am on the countryside what should I say then ? Sheep with horns ?  I still move forward and not backwards, in fact it doesn't happen very often that I am quietly quitting, especially when I am angry so it can also be loud. And it's amazing that amazing is on this list, I think they should rather banish the word banish and replace it by "taken out" ! I don't think when I speak and the words sputter out, maybe I should add  every day : OK I will check, I google !

3. February 2nd is Groundhog Day. What's something that feels repeated in your life right now? 

 We have no Groundhog day here and I first had to look up what it meant. I learned , that on February 2, when the groundhog is said to come out of its hole at the end of hibernation and sees that the weather is sunny, it goes back into its hole, because it thinks there will be six weeks more of winter. Maybe I was a Groundhog in my previous life because I too prefer my hole. 

What feels repeated ? all days, always the same, Routine days, and I hate it. I stay in my hole and wait for my energy to come back !

4. What's a food you love that's named after a place? 

                       The Berliner (from Berlin)                                 

5. What's the best season of the year to visit your city or your part of the country? Tell us why. 

That's a good question ! Especially since the climate change ! I live near Brussels and besides January you can come each month, and visit things with or without rain, when it's cold or warm, there are no rules. Sometimes May is nice, last year it rained every day, July and August is never guaranteed it can be cold or very hot ! Better google before going and ask for the weather ! 

6. Insert your own random thought here. 

It has now been 8 months since Rick passed away. I thought that over time the sorrow would ease a bit, but the opposite is the case. Now that all the paperwork is behind me, I realize that I'm missing him in all corners and it happens that I hear or read something and want to tell him, open my mouth and close it immediately. And then it hurts again. 

I force myself to go to the cinema or the theater and to travel a bit, not for long just to be distracted. But I don't feel the same joy as before. I also became more anxious and more aggressive towards men, because lots of them think that I am a weak old woman, it's for sure that it takes me more strength to handle things I also did before, but then Rick was there to back me up.




While walking around or shopping I met a few dogs who looked so funny that suddenly I had to laugh and forgot this horrible January month which made people aggressive and depressive and also physically sick. Tomorrow it's finished !

more participants here, and Image-in-ing

30 Jan 2023


Test for those who forget to wash their feet !





Saturday morning Maria came to clean the apartment, she prefers to work on a Saturday because then she is sure that there are no strikes. Except the trains, they like to spoil the weekend of people. 
I had not slept very well and each time I tried to watch TV I fell asleep. Therefore I moved to the computer wrote some posts, and then digged out old pictures from  the past, which Rick had scanned out of an Album, page per page and not photo per photo So I had to cut out the photo and tried to make it better than the original. That took quite some time, interrupted by a phone call from Isabel who wanted to know how I feel, she is such a sensible girl ! and then another "girl" I know who wanted also to know how I felt, but only to talk for an hour about her broken hip, her blood tension and the whole medical folder, which I knew already by heart. I think she just needed to talk. It didn't matter if I listened or not. The good thing with a smartphone is, you put it besides you and continue what you are just doing in my case, I cut out the photos. I hope I will never become like that !
Amongst the photos I found one of my son in a costume of Superman which I had done myself for the Carnival at school.

For us it was not at school but on the street, I had bought the two wigs and we had a lot of fun.
On Sunday I read the notice for the step counter which I had bought on Internet last week. It is like a USB stick and I charged it for a few hours until it was fully charged. Then I did a reset and tonight I will see how many steps I have done. For one km I need to make 1200 steps. I have already done 350 steps in 2 hours only walking around in the apartment. 

There is a clip attached to it and I clipped it on my trousers. To make this photo I had to do like a contortionist.

Then two of my neighbor friends came and we watched together on YouTube, the River Cruise I will do in May. And then we chatted about the building what should be repaired, what had been done. The afternoon went quickly by and now the day is over.

29 Jan 2023


Since May 29, 2022, on each 29 I am feeling sad and unwell. It was on the 29th of May last year, that Rick passed away and left me alone. I thought with the time it would be better, but I notice that the grief gets worse. One friend told me that this is normal, she had the same with her husband, the first months I was so busy with the administration papers that I had less time to think, mull over, and having this stitch in my heart. 

Therefore my Sunday Selection concerns our life together and our happy marriage which lasted 54 years   

 As  young, parents and then grandparents

How it started and one of the last pictures. He had Parkinson/Alzheimer and was 81 years old