STUCK IN A CAR WASH TUNNEL

"Pink" pictures are here

Of all cars I owned during the years my favorite one is and was the 2CV ! It was a very special car. People called it "duck" and I had a green one on which I had glued 2 big yellow ducks on each door it looked very funny and I couldn't drive icognito of course.

The car had a very thin steel shell and a canvas sunroof. The steel was so thin that you could get the impression if you looked hard at the car it would make a hole. The gear shifter too was very special, it came horizontally out of the dashboard with the handle curved upwards. It had a strange shift pattern: the first was back on the left, the second and third were inline, and the fourth could be engaged only by turning the lever to the right from the third. Once you knew this it was very easy to drive.

The wipers' speed was variable with car speed. When the car was waiting at a crossroad, the wipers were not powered; but a handle under the speedometer allowed to power them by hand. This car could go everywhere it was like a jeep, in clogs and across muddy unpaved roads etc.

One sunny day I found my car dirty and decided to go through an automatic car wash. I thought my car is just like others. But when I was in the tunnel I realized it wasn't quite the same. I was sitting in a thunderstorm ! The rolling brushes made an awful noice on the canvas roof and on either side it was not better. I thought in a few minutes it will be my end and I will be brushed to death.

The slow moving of the rails seemed to last an eternity. And then, suddenly the car stopped, it didn't move at all anymore while the brushes continued over my car with a terrible big noise. I got a little worried and honked once. Still nothing I honked more and more, nothing. Now I wanted to get out of here but how ? I tried to use the manual wipers but the brushes hindered it. I could hardly see anything because it was quite dark and water was running over all windows. I thought the roof will break.

Suddenly the noise stopped and the brushes stopped too. Now their plastic fringes were hanging all over the car. A deadly silence after this rolling thunderstorm. Suddenly I saw a white face through the fringes with it's nose pressed against the side window and glowing eyes starring at me. I leant back startled and then I heard a voice "ça va Madame ?" (everything OK madame ?) and pushed a sigh of relief it was over !

This was my prison !

Two men pushed the car with me outside in the sunshine, I climbed out and have to admit my legs felt like butter. But one thing is sure, my car has never been so clean than this day !

FRIDAY FEAST

Appetizer
Name a great website you would recommend to others.

The cob web sides in the basement of my castle in Transylvania. They are beautiful, real artwork from big black spiders.

Soup
On a scale of 1-10 (with 10 as highest), how often do you dream at night?

Not at all ! I have to get out of my coffin and look for some fat people for drinking their blood, and when I sleep during the day I usually don't dream at all.

Salad
Did you have a pet as a child? If so, what kind and what was its name?

I even had more pets ! Very cute bats. My favorite one was as big as a cat and I had named it "Sweetie"

Main Course
If you had the chance to star in a commercial, what would you choose to advertise?

The red cross of course ! They have such an enormous quantity of blood in stock !

Dessert
What is your favorite kind of hard candy?

Coagulated blood candies ! There taste is just devine !

signed : Countess Dracula (aka Gattina)

THURSDAY THIRTEEN

For other Horror Stories please go to Mrs. Lifecruiser"

These are 13 very scary events happening in one night !




I think there are a lot of people having the same problem. They lay in bed and with open eyes they listen to a noise, a very special noise, it first sounds like a light tiger's purr, then like a defect car motor and then like a power saw ! From patient listening you suddenly develop murderous intents : Your parner snores !

1. You whistle. Your partner stops for a second, and continues

2. You push him with your ellbow he stops and growls and .... continues

3. You use your ellbow again a little stronger, he stops growls and turns around ... silence and then starts again

4. You sigh and think about times when your partner slept like an angel with a peaceful happy face and didn't make any noise besides a soft breathing

5. You can't do anything else but listening and it gets louder and louder. You kick your partner with your foot, hard ! He grumbles, sighs and turns around

6. You start to get angry you can't sleep. You throw the covers away and get up. No changement. You go into the kitchen and drink some water

7. You come back, the noise is still there. You jump in the bed, he jumps too stops a second and continues

8. You take your pillow and put it over your ear. Nothing to do the noise has increased slightly

9. You take a book and slam it on your partner"s head. He stops opens one eye and asks you "Is there something darling ?"

10. You mumble a negative answer lay down, sigh and try to sleep but your ears are watching for a noise

11. It starts again ! He snores and snores peacefully and from time to time he champs with satisfaction

12. It gets louder and louder now the level on "power saw". With rage you take your pillow and a blanket and flee to the living room on the couch. But you still hear the noise in your mind ...

13. In the morning you sit at the breakfast table with dark rings under your eyes and a pale face you yawn and feel so tired. He comes in looking fresh and rested and asks "Did you sleep well Darling ?"

That's enough !!!

You jump up, take the bread knife and stab him. Now he lays on the white kitchen floor in a big pool of blood the knife in his chest his fresh looking face now white, just like yours.... He will never snore again ! *

*Don't worry this "happy" end is only for Halloween

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

COMPILED NEWS

If you want to decorate your blog for Halloween, I have free Headers for you here. I amused myself !

Even in Halloween saison we shouldn't forget the News. It is very important for you to know what is going on in the world. That's why I report the latest News and for horror stories I sent you to the Capitain of the Cyber cruise Mrs. Lifecruiser.




Princess Ariane christened on Saturday
Princess Ariane, the third daughter of crown prince Willem-Alexander and princess Máxima of the Netherlands was christened at the Klooster church in The Hague on Saturday. This will not please the Devil ! Now they are "blessed" with a third girl ! and he so much wanted a boy ! Poor WillEm (not to confond with WilliAm! On the official christening picture they reminded me the Adams family (which usually is not the case) that's why I allowed myself to correct it a bit.



Before smoking After smoking

Crown Princess Mette-Marit chided for smoking

Norway's crown princess was caught smoking at a wedding recently, and that's disappointed officials at the country's cancer society. I Can't understand that ! They always complain that the royal family costs too much, and now they want absolutely keep one member in good health to last longer, instead of letting her smoke and send her to the graveyard ! That would be one person less to pay for ! Strange ...




Row over Italian toilet artwork
A toilet which flushes to the sound of Italy's national anthem has been impounded by police in northern Italy, sparking great patriotic debate. Prosecutors say the national anthem should not be ridiculed. Why ridiculed ? This is the only place where you can listen to music attentively and not being disturbed ! Take your Ipod along and sit down ! A lot of Italians don't even know this music ! It could be a good mean to learn it.

Minister sees red at Trevi prank
Italy's Culture Minister Francesco Rutelli wants a new anti-vandalism law after a man threw a bucket of red dye into the Trevi fountain in Rome. I can only shake my head ! This minister has never heard about Halloween ! It was only to color the Trevi fountain in an appropriate color ! I think it was a very good idea ! I only miss some skulls, ghosts and witches.

Elephants sense 'danger' clothes
Elephants can tell whether a human is a friend or foe by their scent and colour of clothing, according to Fife experts. It's a pity that humans are not able to do this ! Can you imagine how many deceptions you could avoid to yourself ??



Mini pigs are big success on farm
A Devon fun farm is reaping the rewards of a nine-year breeding programme for miniature pigs.
The pigs, which are about a fifth of the size of ordinary pigs, have been a hit with visitors at Pennywell Farm. How cute ! I see myself already with a little pig on a leash walking down the Boulevard and everybody would look at me ! (or the pig)



A beer bottle in a Kenyan's stomac
A 26 cm long beer bottle containing half a liter of beer had been taken out of the stomach of a Kenyan by surgeons near Nairobi. He already must have filled himself with beer before that he also swallowed the bottle ! Or maybe he didn't want to spoil the environment ?

MANIC MONDAY - FROST

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THE MURDER OF MR. FROST

Mrs Frost looked out of the window covered with a frost pattern into the black frost which was there outside. She thought of Mr. Frost, her husband and the frosty athmosphere between them. Although the house was frost protected and the heating on she was shivering. Soon he would come home, through the sharp frost, his nose red and drippling and his car frost covered.

She sighed and took an important decision to put an end to her frostbitten marriage, she decided to kill him in a way that nobody would suspect her. She put on her coat went out and walked through the black frost to the pharmacy. There she asked for a frost protection agent, which was handled over to her in a glass bottle.

Mrs. Frost returned home on the frost covered sidewalk back to her house. In the kitchen she put the liquid in a frost proofed glass and in the fridge. Meanwhile Mr. Frost had come home too and complained bitterly about the frost outside. For once she smiled and didn't say anything not to create a with frost filled athmosphere. She didn't give him a frosty look but proposed to drink a glass together to warm up from the upcoming night frost. Mr. Frost eagerly agreed, he needed a drink to warm up himself.

Mrs. Frost went into the kitched, opened the fridge and took out the frost covered glass. The liquid inside was transparent like water. She took the bottle of Whisky and added a big ration. With satisfaction she looked at the full glass a frosty look in her eyes. In the living room she handled over the glass to Mr. Frost. Mr. Frost took it and emptied it in one shot. He closed his eyes with a deep sigh, bent over and fell on the floor. His from frost redded nose turned white.

Mrs. Frost pulled him until the door and sighed because he was so heavy. Then she pulled him through the frost damaged garden into a frost covered shed. She went back to the house and inside discovered that she had got a frost bite, but she didn't care. She fell in the armchair and began to think what to do with the corpse. But then she thought there is ground frost so impossible to dig and burry him in the with frost covered garden. She would wait.

And Mrs. Frost still waits until today because the seasons came and went and there was still frost everywhere.

****

I hope I used up all "Frost" definitions !

Don't forget tomorrow Halloween events start on Captain Mrs. Lifecruiser's blog !!!

VERNISSAGE

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Yesterday was the Vernissage of our Exposition in Waterloo. That always sounds very good to a painter even if he is only a lesure painter.

big

Before the crowd arrived the room finally ready, looked like this. I couldn't chase the photographer, because he was the official one from the Waterloo local Newspaper ! He must have had the same ideas as me because later too he always was in my way !


Of course as a souvenir I had to take a picture of my hanging paintings.


The men for once worked, Champagne opening is a strictly male business. The present females had to prepare the cookies and little appetizers.



Then arrived the VIPs. The man hidden behind me is the major. I asked somebody to take a picture of the politicians and other VIPs with me but he got it wrong and took a picture of me with them. And with his economical thinking he only took one picture not to use up the film. Digital camera what's that ?


Our teacher talking to some people


We even had very intellectual dogs who as you can see were very impressed by all the paintings.



Our oldest member 84 years old received her daughter, granddaughter and her great grandchildren, who are not on the picture because they were running and playing around. 4 generations, that's something. The family was very proud of her.



Somebody brought a jardiniere and had put it empty on a table. Although it was a very expensive one in christal Saint Lambert, it had to be decorated. Fortunately I found in the garden these mushrooms and a few green branches and made this flower arrangement. Sometimes with very few things you can do something nice.

The whole day people arrived, we had to explain, chatted a lot, laughed a lot and when I finally got home at 5 pm I was half dead ! My feet burnt, my back ached and my head throbbed from all the laughter and chatting noise.

And today it continues !