27 May 2022


Time flies by so quickly, that I get the impression we are approaching Christmas ! This week we had a moody weather, sunshine, rain, storm, cold, warm and it was difficult to choose something to wear. The pedicure came and it was the first time. She is the same as Rick has in his retirement home. Nice girl to chat with and now I have completely new feet. 

I was not feeling well but went to check on Rick. Ever since I had discovered that one had forgotten him or whatever, I had lost all trust and  checked every day if everything was like it should be. 

This time it was perfect He lay like a prince on his new water mattress and he made travel plans for us again. Then the nurse came and told me that he really is a special case and does things that are actually impossible for someone in his condition. I told her that he was already like that at home and that our four cats jumped off the bed when he turned off the light. 

He must have understood all of that because he ordered me to stop telling stories. The sister was amazed that he had understood all this and we both had to laugh. He also tried to laugh but all wthat came out was a grimace. That was the last time he reacted "normally".

The next day I returned again, and found him sleeping with one of the balls I had brought him squeezing in his hand. Everything was perfect, the ventilator was on and the room was tidy and smelled good. He was well shaved so I didn't wake him up but closed the door and returned home. I went a bit to Adeline my neighbor and she is always so comforting. She has lost one of her three sons when he was only 32 and understands very well what I am feeling. Her hairs became white over night !

On Wednesday I got a call from the home, that Rick's condition has deteriorated and the doctor should come. It was like someone hit me on the head with a hammer, but as always, I do what has to be done, I called our doctor. She told me that she would have to change his medication and that she would start palliative care and that I don't need to come. But I went in the afternoon, he was sleeping, again with the ball in his hands. He didn't wake up and I stayed there watching him sleep and returned home. Strangely I was feeling much better, because now I know that he won't suffer and fall asleep one day nobody knows when. 

This weekend my son will come again, he wanted to come right away, but I told him that it is better to stay home and rest, if something happens he still can jump in his car and come. After all the poor boy has also a lot of work and his wife is not feeling well either. 

Looking through the pictures I found a video of Rick, like he was, speaking with his hands and loud and discussing with a friend but as they spoke both at the same time I don't know about what they had this animated discussion. 



more participants at Susanne at Living to tell the Story.

26 May 2022


1. It's National Wine Day (May 25)...do you like wine? Red or white? Dry or sweet? Do you have a favorite? Have you ever been to California wine country? Or any other wine region? What's a dish you make that calls for wine?

Yes, I used to love red and white wine, but that's a long time ago. Now I don't drink any alcohol anymore. Being married to an Italian I had to taste all home made wines of all uncles and friends, the Californian wine I drank for the first time in Madison/Wisc with me American aunt and then later in in the UK. Now it exists everywhere in Europe too. Yes I have been to California three times.

In Belgium where I live it's the use to drink wine with a meal  and it depends what. With fish you drink white wine and with meat red.  

2. What's something you've whined about lately?

That my husband's condition had deteriorated a lot in the last four days, and that he needed more attention and care. After having more then "whined", it had its effect and now he is well taken care of.  

3. Last time you were 'wined and dined'? Tell us about it. 

My son spent the last weekend with me and we went to a Greek restaurant, which was very good. We sat in the garden, the sun was shining and the food excellent.

4. Three cheers for ....... my real and virtual friends who help and support me in these difficult times

5. This will be the last Hodgepodge in the month of May. Somehow next Wednesday the calendar rolls into June. Before we go though, sum up your May in twelve words or less. 

The usual routine, visits to Rick, once to a flower show, put summer furniture out, bought a parasol, had some friends here, twice a visit of son and grandson and that was it. 

6. Insert your own random thought here. 

Today I have no other thought in my mind then how long will Rick stay in this terrible state. Everything is done that he doesn't suffer but honestly I am in a sort of nightmare and hope that I will wake up. 




25 May 2022


Arthur stole a croissant in the neighborhood

more participants here, and Image-in-ing here

24 May 2022


During the bloody battle of Waterloo the Duke of Wellington used the Mont St. Jean farm as hospital for his wounded soldiers. This was in 1815.

Today it has become a very beautiful restaurant, with a brewery and a museum. And sometimes there are festivals of Wikings, Scots, Celtics and others and each Sunday morning there is a big flea market on the grounds around the farm. 

We went there on Sunday to see the Wikings and the stalls and all Wiking accessories, and had the intention to have a little lunch there on the terrace. But there were so many people and the cobble stones made it hard to walk so that our visit was quite short but I could take some photos and anyway next year the Wikings are coming back and I have seen it already.

I could see the Waterloo Lion from far

The parking was full, difficult to find a parking place

The first Wiking I saw posed for me with pleasure

A today's Wiking, my son

The entrance

There were a few falcons

I wanted to take a picture of the dog, but the girl also posed, not really a Wiking

I thought the girl had a dog on her lap but in reality it was one of the fury scarfs of stuffed foxes which were in fashion to my grandma's time.

and the Wiking rocks !

 Here you find more about the Mont St. Jean Farm 

Linking to



23 May 2022



    18 year old Watchcat

What's that ? I only like mousies

I love camping !







This weekend my son wanted to come and see his Dad again. I told him that now everything is OK and that Rixk mostly sleeps. I was a bit worried about my son,  he looked so tired and apparently doesn't sleep very well either, I thought it would be better to stay home and rest. But he preferred to come. 

Honestly I was happy to have his company, although he spent most of the time with his Dad. We both didn't feel going to a restaurant and I had bought two ready made plates. I had Couscous and he Pasta arrabiata (the spicy sauce) Then he went to say hello to a friend and I watched a movie and then went to bed. 

On Sunday morning when I woke up he had already disappeared. I knew that he wanted to got to the market  which didn't interest me, anyway I have first to wake up slowly before I get up because of my breathing problem. This morning it was worse then the other days. I never know before !. I drank my coffee, watched the News and dressed. Meanwhile he had come back had bought croissants which he ate all, as I had already eaten the part of my breakfast and what I had prepared for him was still there.

While he was away I had discovered that on the farm Mont St. Jean where Wellington had installed the hospital for his wounded soldiers, was a Wicking fest. 

I thought that would be nice to cheer us up and we could eat there too. Unfortunately there were so many people and it was difficult to walk on the old cobble stones, that I had to sit down twice because I was breathless. 

We decided not to eat in this crowd I had seen enough, and had taken my pictures. I waited until my son had found the car and picked me up so that I didn't have to walk. 

We ended up not in our "old Greek restaurant" which was closed but one just two houses further. It was very good and portions for a giant ! Son ate it all. I had an enormous Durum which I couldn't finish and thought I take it home and eat it for supper. 

They had a nice little garden so we could eat outside.

We returned home, i.e he let me out and continued to see his father sleep. That's what Rick does mostly now. I was feeling weak and fell on the sofa. 

Then I got crazy because I couldn't find my smartphone anymore. I looked everywhere and as I don't even know my own telephone number. I called son on Messenger with my computer. No answer finally I sent him a mail. I don't know his number by heart either. Exhausted I sat down and looked for the remote control which had also disappeared. It was my day. But falling on the sofa I felt something under me .... I was sitting on my telephone and the remote control showed up too. I had to laugh about myself, but at the same time I was worried because I can't allow myself to get a depression or worse. 

Rick has slept most of the time while his son was there and probably didn't even realize that he was there which in one way is good, because since I know him he hated when being sick that somebody sits in his room and watches over him. But I can't tell that, I am sure my son wouldn't believe me. Maybe he loves to be watched when he sleeps. Each person is different. I was happy that he has checked that everything was OK with Rick and that now he is well taken care of. That would have be the occasion for me to take some forces. Unfortunately it did not. Tomorrow I will go.

Then he left returning to Amsterdam and I felt completely worn out. All things that needed to be done were left, well I ask somebody else. 

I miss Rick more and more, he always comforted and supported me for 52 years . Of course we had our up and downs and thunderstorms, but nothing really serious. Nobody could ever separate us we were a team  besides being a couple.

Now the only one who shares my sorrow and serves as fury tissue  is little Rosie. At least animals always love you and  never disappoint you.