13 RULES FOR MEN

What collar to wear today ??

13 things a man should not do if he wants to keep his wife ! (To be read to your partner when he is stuck somewhere and can't move)

1. Don't hang at TV the whole evening and watch football or other sports while munching loudly stuff producing a lot of crumps around you

2. Don't drink too much beer and get a big belly, and then complain that's because of her (bad) cooking

3. Don't leave your socks, underwear etc in the whole house so that she can trace back where you started to get undressed

4. Eat everything she has prepared for you without a word even if you hate this plate. She could be offended

5. Don't smell like a beer barrel when you wish to kiss her

6. Don't snore like a motor saw

7. Don't die when you only have a little cold, even if you think it's your last hour

8. Don't put too much beer cans or wine bottles in the fridge so that she has no room for the food anymore

9. Don't look at other women when she is around, she should be the only one you look at, even if it's not true and you like to have a better view.

10. Don't tell her she spents too much money at the hairdresser, because you don't see any difference between before and after

11. Don't spend too much time in the bathroom before going out, she could think that instead of your business meeting you have a date

12. Don't complain that you don't have enough room for your shoes because hers are all over two shelves (at least)

13. Don't try to overtake a car when it's not absolutely necessary she doesn't want to die yet and make you to a merry widower.

If these rules are followed you get a chance that your marriage or partnership will last more then a year.