Showing posts with label Compiled funny News. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Compiled funny News. Show all posts

7 Oct 2008

COMPILED NEWS

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Lost penguins get Brazil air lift

Some of the penguins are thought to have travelled 3,000km. Hundreds of penguins have been returned to their native territory in the south Atlantic ocean by an air force plane after being found along Brazil's coast. I am really happy that the penguins landed in Brazil and not in the USA ! can you imagine the work of the anti terrorist department to check hundreds of penguins if they are not carrying weapons or plans for terrorist attacks ?

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Elvis is Alive Museum nears death

Collection that supports theory Presley never died fails to sell on eBay

WRIGHT CITY, Mo. - The Elvis is Alive Museum will not live, at least not for now.
Andy Key tried to sell the Missouri museum twice on eBay. He received no bids by the time the auction ended Friday. He did get one bid at his first asking price of $15,000, but it turned out to be from a child playing on a computer, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported. If you have some money left from the economical crises, here is a sure investment to make !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

After losing 500 pounds, Mexican man to wed

Once 1,230 pounds, Uribe was declared the world's heaviest man

Manuel "Meme" Uribe, 42, kisses his girlfriend Claudia Solis during an interview with the Associated Press in Monterrey on June 9, 2008. Once declared the world's most obese man, Manuel Uribe is getting hitched. The Mexican native says he will wed longtime girlfriend Claudia Solis on Oct. 26 in Monterrey. The two will be married in a civil ceremony at a location still to be decided. Uribe is unable to walk, and leaving his house means being towed through the streets on his specially made bed. Love can fall everywhere. Hopefully he is still able to make babies, although I think they might have some technical difficulties.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Goat 'condoms' save Kenyan herds

The olor is held in place by a rope or an elastic strap. Maasai herdsmen in Kenya have turned to an age-old contraceptive device, the "olor", to protect their precious goat herds from an ongoing drought. The olor is made from cowhide or a square piece of plastic, and is tied around the belly of the male goat.It prevents the bucks from mating with the female goats.
Doesn't that look sexy ? I think a fashion creator should adapt this for men maybe in different colors and with little flowers ??


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Recycling litter funds honeymoon
A couple spent three months collecting and recycling litter to pay for their honeymoon flights. It took thousands of cans and bottles to a recycling centre. For every four recycled items, they earned a reward point which was then converted into BA air miles. They amassed 36,000 miles, which they used to fly back in business class from their US honeymoon. Isn't that a good idea, instead of taking a credit to finance your next holidays dig in your bin and collect money or flight miles !

9 Sept 2008

COMPILED NEWS

For Robert's "Show me" photo challenge go here



Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Zara is upping her horsepower

TOP horsewoman Zara Phillips (daughter of Prince Anne) climbs into the saddle of a mini-motorbike — just like her grandfather Prince Philip. The 27-year-old royal, in jodhpurs and a riding hat, took some time out during the Burghley Horse Trials . The Duke of Edinburgh, 60 years her senior, has been seen zooming around on a similar bike during previous horse events.
No wonder that Philip needs a motorbike now to run after young women, he is approaching the 90 th !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Cows milk the benefits

FLUFFY fingered farmers are pampering their dairy cows with massages and comfy mattresses to produce better tasting milk. Some spoilt herds are being tucked up each night on three inches of soft rubber and sawdust while some are lucky enough to get a WATER bed. Ah ! isn't that nice to see happy cows ? we probably will be less happy with the milk price !


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

This is a real wind farm

WINDY cows are having bright red tanks strapped to them to check the gases they let off — in a bid to beat global warming. The farm animals burp and parp vast quantities of methane — one of the most potent greenhouse gases — due to their slow digestive system. I suggest to do the same with us humans especially on crowded streets, maybe we can safe our planet this way ?


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Bear busts drugs farm

A BLACK bear has raided a secret marijuana farm so many times it has chased the growers away. Utah cops found food containers ripped apart and cans with bear teeth and claw marks strewn across the abandoned camp.This bear is definitely law-enforcement minded, said the County Sherif. I am sure he will get a medal, that's some dissuasive assistant !


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Tearaway tortoise bolts 13 miles

IMMY the tortoise amazed her owners by walking 13 MILES from home in two weeks.
They had lost the pet after it disappeared from their shed. They put up posters around their home in Trowbridge, appealing for sightings. A fortnight later a woman spotted 50-year-old Timmy on the street, 13 miles far from home. She should participate in the next Olympics in London ! She walks even farer as I do in 2 weeks !

29 Jul 2008

COMPILED NEWS

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

I am back from one week in a Summer Art Academy, so here are the latest compiled news (more about my stay and the different art workshops in the next days)

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Streakers hit Charles polo match
The streakers could be seen on the event's big screen

Three male streakers invaded the pitch being watched by the Prince of Wales during an
annual society polo event. The naked trio emerged from the grandstand during a match between England and Australia at the Cartier International event in Windsor. Naked men I have seen already, why didn't they show Charles face on the screen ?? That would have been funny at least !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.usImage Hosted by ImageShack.us


PRINCESS Anne displayed her legendary thriftiness at the weekend — in a frock she first wore 27 YEARS ago at Princess Diana’s wedding.

PRINCESS Anne displayed her legendary thriftiness at the weekend — in a frock she first wore 27 YEARS ago at Princess Diana’s wedding.
The Princess Royal, 57, picked out the pretty print dress for Lady Rose Windsor’s marriage on Saturday.
And she topped if off with the veiled floral hat also seen when Di married Anne’s brother Prince Charles in 1981. I am so full of compassion ! these poor royals they never do it right. Or they spend too much or they spent not enough, it really must be a difficult life !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


Ritchie says marriage is 'fine'

Guy Ritchie and Madonna married in Scotland in December 2000
Film director Guy Ritchie has brushed off speculation about his marriage to Madonna in a US magazine interview.The 39-year-old Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels director told People: "My marriage is fine as far as I'm aware of." The singer and her spokesperson have repeatedly denied reports that the couple were planning a divorce. Divorce or not divorce that is the question ! But a little publicity just before a tour can only be useful !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

US man charged for shooting mower

A 56-year-old man from the Midwestern US state of Wisconsin has been arrested after shooting his lawn mower in his garden because it would not start. Police officers said Mr Walendowski had told them: "It's my lawn mower and my yard, so I can shoot it if I want." He is absolutely right. If you are allowed to buy and have guns why can't you shoot on anything ? That makes no sense. I am only allowed to shoot with a water pistol on my lawn mower !

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Say goodbye to the computer mouse

The world's first computer mouse didn't make any money for its inventor. It's nearly 40 years old but one leading research company says the days of the computer mouse are numbered.
A Gartner analyst predicts the demise of the computer mouse in the next three to five years.
Taking over will be so called gestural computer mechanisms like touch screens and facial recognition devices. My cats will regret the mouse, but I am already keen to see people sitting behind their computers making grimaces to get into different programs, clapping in their hands and touching screens up and down and right and left to fill in a tax form. What a fun would I have to watch employees in public services ! Of course I would never forget my video camera when they check my forms !

20 May 2008

COMPILED NEWS

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Quilly's Alphabet is here
Today T = Greek Temples


Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us

As I just came back from my roundtrip through Greece,

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

here are the latest compact news from Greece. For those who want to read it click here

Mozambique cops 'too fat to run'

All Mozambican policemen will have to undergo fitness training
Mozambique police officers are to undergo a compulsory physical training programme, because some of them are too fat to run after criminals. Ah ! that's the first time I read that people (even if they are policemen) in Africa are too fat !! Are they getting food from the criminals to look "away" ?

Cat and mouse blamed for blackout

Albanians may have found a new villain to blame for the frequent power cuts that have been blighting their lives.The country's main electricity company says a cat chasing a mouse caused a 72-hour blackout in parts of the capital, Tirana. It wasn't my Arthur !

Like a bull in a china shop, but worse

BERLIN (Reuters) - A German family were stunned when a rampaging bull burst through the back door of their house, charged around the living room, and then left by the front door.

"The animal basically did a tour of the hall, the kitchen and the living room before leaving the building," said Paul Kemen, a spokesman for police in the western city of Aachen on Monday. "It came in the back and went out the front."

None in the family were injured, but the bull laid waste to furnishings, causing an estimated 10,000 euros ($15,600) of damage, police said. The bull left after the owner of the house opened the front door for it. Lucky family ! the only strange visitors I have are neighbour cats and they never did any damage and I have never been in the Newspaper for that !