A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT !

I suppose that everybody has a favorite TV series. Mr. G and I love to watch the Midsomer murders whenever they are on TV, which unfortunately doesn't happen very often. Only 2 French speaking channels have them and one German. Therefore Inspector Barnaby speaks perfect French or German. I only heard his original voice once, when I was in the UK.

Of course we were still very behind the actual series, so yesterday was the evening of a big disappointment ! We saw a French speaking Inspector Barnaby with DS Ben Jones, (Troy was already gone) after having solved the murder of 2 and a half persons (the third one was only half dead and actually survived) announcing his retirement and presenting his "cousin" John as the new Chief inspector.

I like this type of crime stories, they are thrilling without wild shootings like in the American series, except the good old Colombo with his invisible wife and some other series which I liked too. But these CSI series where you see outhanging stomacs, vomit and other appetizing analysis on your screen while possibly you have your supper, wild shooting and blood almost streaming out of the TV and on the floor is not so much to my taste. Some of them are just limit, but I don't like the Miami red haired guy at all he always holds his head bias when he talks to somebody. I call him the bias head.

After having tried to solve the murders of around 273 persons over 14 years, Mr. Barnaby now retired. Why can't he do like the pope ? He never will retire ! I only hope that his "cousin" is a good replacement ! Mr. G. had calculated that there were an average of 3 murders per film.

These kind of calculations are made by an overworked retired man (mine)





Now, at the same age, we are both retired ...



I think he badly needs a support for his head !

THURSDAY THIRTEEN

Sometimes I eat supper while watching CSI, no matter which one it's always quite bloody ! Here are 13 items I saw last night while eating


1. Bleeding bullet holes, in a chest

2. One bloddy eye laying on the table and watching me suspiciously

3. an open stomac with undigested Hot Dogs

4. an open heart

5. A bullet going through a throat and coming out on the other side through the neck

6 A stick from the backhead through the nose to show the way of a bullet

7. A cut off black finger

8. A corpse with open chest, bloody pieces hanging out

9. A cut off leg besides a torso

10. A face without nose and starring eyes

11. Bloody bowel content

12. A slick mass of yellow brain

13. Corpses in various states of decomposition

And now I wish you a nice meal !

THURSDAY THIRTEEN

Usually in the evening we have our supper while watching TV. When you have a good "chance" then you can watch a CSI series. In French it's called "The Experts from ... (Las Vegas, Miami, New York etc) I like these series because it shows what today's science allows to solve a crime, e.g. to find a murderer just with a little piece of a toenail. I also admire this ultra modern scientifical instruments. The only problem is that you better not watch when you eat. For some people it could be dramatic ! Here is the description of one evening :

13 things while watching a CSI series

1. When cutting off a little piece of my steak and put it in my mouth, a car explodes on the screen. While I am masticating I see a completely burnt person looking like a too much grilled part of a barbecue with pieces of skin hanging from his face and other body parts. Big zoom on the burnt face to make it more fascinating.

2. While I swallow my piece of meat, big zoom on another face, even more spectular, no lips anymore and pieces of raw pink skin are visible. Apparently that makes it more colorful for the film director.

3. I take a little of the roasted potatoes, that fits in the movie. Suddenly in the to black burnt head 2 eyes open wide ! They look horrible without eyelashes. I swallow my potatoe, the eyes were blue.

3. My eyes still fixed on the screen, and masticating mecanicaly, I am now in the pathology and the burnt corpse lies naked (except the private parts of course, the film could be forbidden) on a table but you had the satisfaction to see all other burnt parts in all details.

4. The pathologist opened the chest with something I had missed, because I had cut another piece of my steak.

5. He tores the cut appart and I had the opportunity to see a lot of in blood swimming mashed things. That makes me think that I have to buy ketchup.

6. While I am busy with my vegetables, the pathologist announces that he has to amputate the fingers of the still living person. Meanwhile they had found out that it was a woman something was missing.

7. Unfortunately I missed the amputation because something felt off my fork. But then I saw one of the CSI man holding the cut fingers in his hand and big zoom for the watching public. They looked like burnt hot dogs.

8. Meanwhile the pathologist had found out that the dead person had been shot before he had burnt in the car

9. To make sure that everybody could see exactly where the bullet went in and where it came out he took a long stick and put it through the two holes. From the back to the chest. I masticated my steak, unfortunately no en brochettes, that would have been more adequate.

10. The woman had been rolled up in bandages and looked like a mummy. Big zoom again on the open naked eyes in the white wrapped head. I took another piece of roasted potatoes.

11. While I ate peacefully, the mummy was unrolled and lie now in full view on the operating table

12. The pathologist pulled off the burnt skin with a pair of tweezers and again a big zoom on the raw flesh.

13. The movie continued that way and after exactly 45 min the killer was found. (And our supper finished)



Moral of this TT for all Americans and Canadians celebrating Thanksgiving, don't eat your turkey when you watch a CSI series on TV!

I personally don't understand why it is necessary to show all these disgusting details ? The series would be much nicer without. Not everybody is able to make the difference between reality and fiction.