2 Oct 2014

HOW TO INVENT NEW TAXES ?

Inventing new taxes to fill in the big hole in the government's accounts, makes all treasury secretaries of the world very happy. If in normal life they are quite boring and unimaginative and usually not creative at all, when it comes to invent taxes, they suddenly develop an extraordinary fantasy ! With hungry eyes and pointed ears they look everywhere where they could get some more taxes to collect !

I suppose it's in every country the same, and in this one our treasury secretary, hasn't slept either ! After taxes on house, ground, car, bikes and motorbikes, heritage, income, pensions and fortune (yes even that, it's better you remain poor !) he now saw his chance in air pollution, world warm ups, smog and ozone.

He happily rubbed his hands and his heart was full of joy ! What kind of taxes could he create to also profit from our sick globe ? The garbage ! Yes ! that's a good idea but how ? He thought it over and over and then had the idea of his life ! Just banning the heavy metal garbage bins and only allow special colored plastic bags. The garbage men also would be happy (and then vote for him) because it's less heavy to carry. But what color ? He looked to the sky and choose light blue for cans and plastic bottles.

He looked at the white (short) skirt of his secretary and choose white for household trash. Of course you have to buy these bags in the city hall and if ever you put another "ordinary" plastic bag on the street, it is not taken or you even can get a fine.

But what to do then with paper and cartons ? So he added a little tax on the house tax and allowed the garbage men to pick them up twice per month. To make the tax again a little bigger, he also added a little bit for street cleaning.

He racked his brain and hurrah ! he found something else ! Pollution caused by cars and trucks ! Little more taxes to pay on the trucks and some more fine to pay for car owners if they don't respect the speed limit when there is smog.

Finally he thought, it's not so bad. With the VAT (value added tax) on all bills and invoices there is also some money coming in. And then last but not least, as it is so warm already why not invent a tax on barbecues ? It pollutes the air too ! To watch over all the culprits who make a barbecue in their gardens he would create a special police unit who should overfly the gardens by helicopter and send a special agent to this house to collect a barbecue tax.

But there was a problem. Sausages do more smoke then steaks, and pork and beef is also different so what to do ? Easy ! For sausages it will be 40 € and for steaks 30 € tax on barbecue, payable immediately. For pork he is not sure yet, he first has to try it out himself when he makes his next barbecue !

The last tax invention was reported to the population in the news as an April fools joke. It created hot phone lines, overcharged internet and almost riots !



Jenny Matlock

10 comments:

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Gattina .. tax on bar-b-queing - a possibility ... what a great post - and we are taxed in the most strange ways .. I'm not sure it all helps. Simplification would ... the cartoon is good we do only die once, but we pay taxes like there is no tomorrow!

Cheers Hilary

Jo said...

OMW I had such a great laugh now. None of this is impossible, hey. All modern countries are the same! Thanks for this post!

Andrew said...

Good laugh, especially about the barbecue tax. I wonder if that could be used here next April. I would rather live in a country with high taxes that gives their citizens a good way of life and looks after the disadvantaged. I think Ronald Reagan was once governor of California and he reduced taxes a lot, and the people were happy, until the roads and the transport systems fell apart and the crime rate increased dramatically. So be careful what you wish for if you want to pay less tax.

carol l mckenna said...

Fun and creative post for T!

artmusedog and carol (A Creative Harbor)

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

Taxes! Yep, we have our fair share here also....

Sallie (FullTime-Life) said...

You are so funny! I wouldn't be surprised to find out that it was you who first reported on that tax on April Fools.

Loree said...

Yep, taxes on everything :(

A Lady's Life said...

lol yup we all have to write our mps and tell them to cut taxes .

I do. Kids today have no ambition to pay for pensions because they say they wont get any when it is their time.
Government should be reminded that it is against human rights to pay taxes lol
They have to learn to tighten the belt like every one else and not be so generous with money that is not theirs.

Grantham Lynn said...

Fun post! Thanks for coming by my Trail class post!

Splendid Little Stars said...

no possible situation must be left untaxed!
even bicycles??!!